Ben Franklin Mob H3

(Feel free to substitute Philly)

(This is usually sung with only one or two verses. The chorus follows every verse.)

Oh the eagles, they fly high in Mobile (in Mobile!),
Oh the eagles, they fly high in Mobile (in Mobile!),
Oh the eagles, they fly high,
And they shit right in your eye,
Thank God the cows don’t fly in Mobile!

(Chorus:)
In Mobile! In Mobile! In Mo- In Mo- In Mo- In Mobile!
Oh the eagles they fly, and they shit right in your eye,
Thank God the cows don’t fly in Mobile!

(Additional verses:)

The cows they are all dead,
But the babies must be fed,
So they milk the bulls instead in Mobile.

There’s a girl by the name of Dinah,
Who thinks there’s nothing finer,
Than a prick up her vagina, In Mobile.

If you’re ever thrown in jail in…
and you need a piece of tail
Well the sheriff’s wife’s for sale, In Mobile.

Oh there’s a brand-new lighthouse…
Which the birds use for a shit-house,
Now the lighthouse is a white house, In Mobile.

There’s a man by the name of Hunt…
Who thought he had a cunt,
But his balls were back to front in, In Mobile.

There’s a man by the name of West…
Who thought he had a breast,
But his balls were on his chest, In Mobile.

Oh the girls they wear tin undies…
And they take them off on Sundays,
You should see the boys on Mondays, In Mobile.

There’s a shortage of good whores…
But there’s keyholes in the doors,
And there’s knotholes in the floors, In Mobile.

Oh the parson is perverted…
And his morals are inverted,
But a thousand he’s converted, In Mobile.

There’s a lad named Dirty Danny…
And he likes a bit of fanny,
And he gets it off of granny, In Mobile.

There’s a bastard named Mercator…
Who’s the greatest fornicator,
Masturbator, cunt-inflater,In Mobile.

There's a shortage of wine glasses..
Because the upper middle classes
Shove the glasses up their asses, In Mobile

Oh the chemists are the key men….
Selling dehydrated semen,
To emasculated he-men, In Mobile.

Oh the privates wash the dishes….
And they dry them on their britches,
Oh the dirty sons of bitches, In Mobile.

Oh the sergeant is a bugger…
And the corporal is another,
And they bugger one another, In Mobile.

Oh they drink their whisky neat….
Till it drops them off their feet,
And they cannot get a beat, In Mobile.

Oh I chased the colonel’s daughter….
And I shagged her when I caught her,
Now the daughter’s got a daughter, In Mobile.

Oh, the cows they are all dead…
So they milk the bulls instead,
‘Cause the bastards must be fed, In Mobile.

Oh the Hashers get no tail in…
So for want of recreation, they indulge in masturbation,
It’s a hell of a situation, In Mobile.

There is fuckin’ in the streets in mobile
There is fuckin’ in the streets cuz they soiled all there sheets
So watch out what’s on your feets in mobile

There’s a hooker who’s named Alice in mobile
There’s a hooker who’s named Alice with her tits she has a phallus
And she’ll fuck you without malice in mobile

Oh they teach the babies tricks in mobile.
Oh they teach the babies tricks and by the time that they are six,
The suck their father's pricks in mobile.

It's a fuck of a situation in mobile.
It's a fuck of a situation and they're sunk in masturbation,
For there ain't no fornication in mobile.

There's a shortage of good fucks in mobile.
There's a shortage of good fucks but they have chickens, geese, and ducks
And the key holes in their trucks in mobile.

There's a man named Brock in mobile.
There's a man named Brock with a multi-colored cock,
Like a stick of candy rock in mobile.

Oh the girls they wear tin pants in mobile.
Oh the girls they wear tin pants but they take them off to dance,
Everybody gets a chance in mobile.

There's a knot hole in the floor in mobile.
There's a knot hole in the floor and they use it for a whore,
and some cocks are really sore in mobile

Oh the ladies have big tits in mobile.
Oh the ladies have big tits and they hang down to their clits,
And we munch them all to bits in mobile.

There’s a curly pubic hair in my beer
There’s a curly pubic hair and it floats from here to there
And I drink cuz I don’t care it’s in my beer